I just signed up for a bean bag league? What am I doing with my life…
So, these corn burgers are made out of fungus…
Why do you think traffic sucked so much? Because it’s so nice out?
Yeah. People are just driving around, rubbernecking the weather.
I will take a shot for every person who buys my book. I may be mildly buzzed, but I’ll still probably be able to drive home.
Aww, I hope you die of alcohol poisoning.
Awwwwww, you’re sweet!