Overheard in My Living Room – Page 3 – OVERHEARD IN MY LIVING ROOM

I will take a shot for every person who buys my book. I may be mildly buzzed, but I’ll still probably be able to drive home. Aww, I hope you die of alcoho...

Overheard/Random and Awesome

So railings then

Posted on December 8, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I think it’s one of those standard things that’s on a ship. You never know who’s going to fall over.

Overheard/Sports & Games

I know I do

Posted on December 4, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I think we can all appreciate that Clay Matthews discovered conditioner.

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Keep dreaming

Posted on December 2, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’m imagining two women and a bedazzler. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

Meaning what exactly

Posted on November 28, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Do we have any dessert-type material? Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

Oh one of those

Posted on November 27, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Yeah, it’s a complete protein. So you can eat it and feel good, and feel smug at the same time. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Cool Facts/Overheard

Sounds complicated

Posted on November 27, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I got up to pee, and I almost fell asleep I was in there so long. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Accurate

Posted on November 27, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

It’s tired in here. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Cool Facts/Overheard

Don’t care

Posted on November 27, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I have no cares. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Three two one

Posted on November 27, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Between the two of you you could be shirtless in moments. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Deal

Posted on November 20, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Come closer to me so it’s easier for me to punch you. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Human Anatomy/Overheard

High praise sir

Posted on November 20, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I want to take my pants off. It’s very good. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Pets

God constantly

Posted on November 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Do you wish you had opposable fingers? Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Drugs/Overheard

Thanks for the education sir

Posted on November 14, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

…but man, now I know so much about meth. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

Sounds like a new invention, good job sir

Posted on November 14, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Cheese + meat is probably also good to stuff into meat. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Cool Facts/Overheard

Prove it sir

Posted on November 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

A sphincter could crush an egg. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

That is never happening

Posted on November 5, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You should make some ludafisk! No. We’d get evicted. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Never my love

Posted on October 20, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Do not stop looking like a banana. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Drinking/Overheard

You and me both son

Posted on October 3, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

A few times I have had to raise my voice, and it only makes me want to start drinking. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Overheard/Sci-Fi

Srsly let’s play right now

Posted on September 26, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

The “fake” D&D was always the best. I used to play as a janitor, and I’d always remove my pants…My character would, not me. Publish...

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Good morning to you too sir

Posted on September 24, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You look like a barn troll. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Family Matters/Overheard

That was rude

Posted on September 20, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I think I just took a wedding crap on your brain and productivity. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Birds & Bees/Overheard

The feeling is mutual

Posted on September 19, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I love your body wash. And your body. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Cool Facts/Overheard

We’re watching it immediately

Posted on September 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

For some reason at home I have this outrageous DVD about cuttlefish. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Overheard/The Great Outdoors

You will face the final reckoning

Posted on September 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I probably would run if I saw a troll Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

Do I do I really

Posted on September 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You know how I hate accidental cheese. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Overheard/The Office

Tomorrow doesn’t look good either

Posted on September 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

My brain is not accepting submissions at this time. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Overheard/The Office

It’s why I come in every day

Posted on September 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Jim is trying to eat my brain today. I desperately want to be there to see that. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Music and the Arts/Overheard

And what if you do

Posted on September 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Frank Sinatra is not a multi-instrumentalist. Not unless you count the triangle, the tambourine, and the eyes. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Drinking/Overheard

TRUTH

Posted on September 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Andre: the beer of champagne. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Drinking/Overheard

Can or should

Posted on September 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You can skip past my beer thoughts. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Drinking/Overheard

Can’t argue with you there

Posted on September 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I would rather drink boxed wine than make decisions. Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Overheard/The Office

Seems normal to me

Posted on August 18, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

i can’t type for hsit naymore Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Random and Awesome

You win

Posted on August 18, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

It’s your rule; you lie in it. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Drinking/Overheard

Nothing really

Posted on August 10, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

What do you want me to do besides drink? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Random and Awesome

Lemme guess

Posted on August 10, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Who’s got two thumbs and is randomly awesome occasionally? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Science & Medicine

Well then

Posted on August 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I don’t know what the world is anymore. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Sports & Games

Keep that shit to yourself sir

Posted on August 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

For ne, that was the most exciting part — clubbing the fish to death with a rock. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Drinking/Overheard

Gotcha

Posted on August 8, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Is she having a bad time? No, she just likes liquor. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Time will tell

Posted on August 8, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Hey, nice soul patch! Yeah, I don’t have a lot of soul to patch, but we’ll see. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/The Office

Good just checking

Posted on August 8, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Are you Larry? So far… Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Sci-Fi

Accurate representation

Posted on August 7, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

The lack of sleep is Captain Picard, the alcohol is Riker, and they turn their keys, and I self-destruct. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Drinking/Overheard

Keep telling yourself that sir

Posted on August 7, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Here’s the thing. It’s not that I drink “too much” — I’m not drunk, when I fall asleep at bars. I’m just really fuckin...

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

Sort of?

Posted on August 7, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I don’t like creme brulee — isn’t that the burned pudding? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

This is the best idea

Posted on August 7, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Can we do it, while I’m eating lamb? Yeah — if I can tell people that story. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/The Office

Just the right amount I think

Posted on August 2, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Do you think she is on too much meth for our website? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Life & Death/Overheard

That’s your opinion sir

Posted on August 2, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

He shouldn’t be smiling. He should be dead. Or at least looking dead. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/The Office

Don’t hold me in anticip

Posted on August 1, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

That is ridiculous. You mean ridiculously awesome. Finish your thoughts, please. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Birds & Bees/Overheard

All in all a fine day

Posted on July 26, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

We ordered room service, had naked eggs benedict, had a great morning. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Always accept a compliment

Posted on July 23, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Nice tits. Thanks. I’m not a lesbian. Either way, thanks.

Music and the Arts/Overheard

I honestly don’t either

Posted on July 22, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’ve been so into Gene Simmons lately. I have no idea why. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Science & Medicine

Do they have a name for that or

Posted on July 15, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You know that blind spot we have in our vision, where our brain fills it in automatically? I have that in my ears, but for chimes. Published with Blogger-droid ...

Music and the Arts/Overheard

Hey how bout shut up

Posted on July 15, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Hey, maybe after this we could listen to some showtunes? Maybe some late nineties Billy Joel? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Family Matters/Overheard

Semantics

Posted on July 14, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I want kids that are magically three and starting to learn and be curious. I don’t want to, like, *have* the kids. That is called adoption. Oh, good point...

Overheard/Pets

Is it that obvious

Posted on July 14, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Did you guys feel left out because you have boyfriends but no dogs? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Words and Phrases

I’ve heard it both ways

Posted on July 10, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Man, my dogs are barking. I’ll be right back. You know that doesn’t mean you have to poop, right? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Words and Phrases

Either way

Posted on June 30, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Your dog’s hanging out. I mean, your tongue’s hanging out. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Yes shut up

Posted on June 30, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

What, are you like the Robin Hood of Blockbuster? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Pets

I wasn’t going to say anything

Posted on June 29, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I think I’m going to make Facebook profiles for my dogs. I bet they get more friends than me. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Catholics & Atheists/Overheard

They never really did you know

Posted on June 29, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Sadly, now that she suspects I’m an atheist, my pleas of “do it for Jesus” don’t really work anymore. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6....

Family Matters/Overheard

Taste is everything

Posted on June 28, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Boy, planning a Lisa-Frank-themed wedding has been harder than I thought. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Drinking/Overheard

Well you can’t have everything Sheila

Posted on June 25, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

It would be nice if I didn’t have to search for you in bathrooms anymore. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

It might help TBH

Posted on June 25, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I can’t eat any more food or I’ll fall asleep. Do you want me to punch you in the face? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Drugs/Overheard

No one is stopping you sir

Posted on June 25, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

This song makes me want to take e and touch people I don’t know. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

Shit you’re onto me

Posted on June 25, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Are you trying to fatten up your bridesmaids? Is this a Hansel and Gretel meal right now? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Oh phew thanks

Posted on June 24, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Spoiler alert: he didn’t drink his own rat tail. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Traditions are everything

Posted on June 24, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

She always puts ridiculous things in her hair on celebrations in my honor. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Words and Phrases

I mean I can

Posted on June 24, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Can you capitalize an exclamation point? Make it super exciting? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Human Anatomy/Overheard

I have that gift

Posted on June 18, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You really know how to make a penis sound dirty. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Seriously go ban yourself

Posted on June 17, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Ugh, I’m sorry. I’m being a major Holden Caulfield today. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Catholics & Atheists/Overheard

Something along those lines

Posted on June 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

It does look like Jesus. Or some religious hippie thing. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Technology and the Internet

Start a petition sir

Posted on June 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Why isn’t there an emoticon for holding a gun to my own head? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Drinking/Overheard

He’ll never know good plan

Posted on June 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’m going to get him hammered on blackberry brandy. Secretly. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Drinking/Overheard

So you are a Klingon then

Posted on June 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I like my drinks like I like my food: fighting back. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Drinking/Overheard

Oh that was you

Posted on June 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

The last time I saw you, you were yelling at a garbage. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Family Matters/Overheard

Understandable

Posted on June 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’m sorry — I was distracted by babies and friends. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Cool Facts/Overheard

At least you have a code

Posted on June 8, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I will believe something when I hear something. Or something. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/The Office

I’m going on break then

Posted on June 8, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Is there a timeline for this? Yes, but there are no numbers. So it’s just a straight line. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Um

Posted on June 8, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I just feel naked without my hat. And my father. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

I too am glad

Posted on June 8, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’m glad I didn’t wear suspenders tonight. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Science & Medicine

This is absolutely true

Posted on June 7, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

If Seth Godin ruled the world, the internet wouldn’t suck so bad. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Let’s check it out immediately

Posted on June 5, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

It sounds like semen and failure down there. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Cool Facts/Overheard

Impressive they are

Posted on May 29, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Man, for being so slow they sure are hard to catch up with. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Birds & Bees/Overheard

You too please

Posted on May 27, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Have an experimental night and a titillating tomorrow! Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/The Office

Project management: the struggle is real

Posted on May 25, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’m just annoyed. I don’t think they’ve done anything. Also, I think they have snaggletooth. It helps me, to think they’re ugly. Publish...

Overheard/Pets

And if they are beef

Posted on May 20, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Unless your keys are made out of beef, I’m pretty sure sending a dog after them isn’t going to help. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Life & Death/Overheard

I do

Posted on May 19, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

And he kept saying he hopes I have a good life. I don’t know why that makes me feel weird. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Family Matters/Overheard

Know thyself

Posted on May 17, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

We were very passive children. Almost noodley. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Science & Medicine

Fuck

Posted on May 17, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

There is literally a shortage of bits on the internet today. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Catholics & Atheists/Overheard

I can be very convincing

Posted on May 15, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

No, Santa will not give you a margarita. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Drinking/Overheard

Facts

Posted on May 15, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Well, I know vermouth is a thing… Do you now. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Pets

Pets benefit us in many ways

Posted on May 11, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I love how puppies sleep on top of each other. Oh, and speaking of teabagging, one totally has his ass covering the other’s face. Published with Blogger-d...

Insults & Injury/Overheard

You’re a weird hippie srsly

Posted on May 10, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I mean, he was a weird hippie, but you know, he was well-spoken, kind of interesting, he didn’t smell– Oh, he smelled. …Oh. Well. Published wi...

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Kind of you sir

Posted on May 7, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

No, I can’t leave my fiancee on her wedding-hair night. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/Random and Awesome

Why would I do this

Posted on May 7, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Go to this creepy-looking health store, get your blood drained or something. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Cool Facts/Overheard

Good

Posted on May 5, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Are you grossed out by gross things? Oh, I like gross things. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/The Office

Good I’ll hold

Posted on April 28, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

So you’re saying you think asking a Monday-through-Friday online publishing company to work with you manually on Saturdays is a reasonable request? Yes, s...

Overheard/Pop Culture

Mmmm

Posted on April 27, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I just typed something about “as soon as you hit the space bar,” and I went all Homer Simpson with a thought bubble. Mmmm… space bar… Pu...

Music and the Arts/Overheard

Are they mutually exclusive tho

Posted on April 21, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Are they going to soundcheck, or is this like a jazz odyssey kind of thing? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Overheard/The Great Outdoors

Me neither srsly

Posted on April 21, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Man, I can’t wait until summer when I can pee outside again. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

Thanks I think

Posted on April 15, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You are bigger than a taco. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Well I can help you there

Posted on April 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I mostly just want to strap something secretly to my thigh. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Family Matters/Overheard

Indeed

Posted on April 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I love her. She’s my boyfriend. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Human Anatomy/Overheard

And both of our sets of boobs came out that night,

Posted on April 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

And both of our sets of boobs came out that night, that’s what I’m saying. And hers were in public. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Overheard/The Great Outdoors

Seriously a wizard

Posted on April 4, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I saw the wind blow!! I think that makes you magical. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Overheard/Technology and the Internet

What’s that url again

Posted on April 4, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’ll keep you posted on things I discover with my live brain cam. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Drugs/Overheard

Wouldn’t want to leave anyone out

Posted on March 29, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Oh, you’re selling hookers and blow now? Put me down for three of each. Well, better make it four for the blow. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Family Matters/Overheard

Success marginal

Posted on March 27, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

That’s Grandpa. I moved him over there hoping that his midsection would come back to life. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

History & Geography/Overheard

Don’t let me stop you

Posted on March 26, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Sodona is such a weird place. I want to just go there and binge on the weirdness. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Birds & Bees/Overheard

May or may not be a medical issue

Posted on March 26, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

That weird feeling I felt in my chest before, I think I feel for her. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Drugs/Overheard

We need to talk

Posted on March 26, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I am so excited for this cigarette. I can taste it in my lungs. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Overheard/The Office

At least we’re all in agreement

Posted on March 26, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I am so creepy. I was talking about it at work, and people agree. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Music and the Arts/Overheard

Thank you

Posted on March 26, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You’re like Stevie Knicks. You travel with multiple scarves. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Overheard/Science & Medicine

Time is relative

Posted on March 23, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Well, it says nine minutes, but I don’t really know how it counts time. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Catholics & Atheists/Overheard

Understatement of the ages

Posted on March 17, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’m so glad I’m not a Christian. It seems to be very stressful. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Now that we’ve got that cleared up

Posted on March 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You should know, though, that when I first looked at it, I thought it was a straight-on picture and that you were wearing a lumpy beret. Not that you look like ...

Human Anatomy/Overheard

Back off it’s natural

Posted on March 15, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

No, this week should be fine, these guys are leaving tomorrow. Which is good, because its starting to smell like nuts in here. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6...

Cool Facts/Overheard

I beg to differ

Posted on March 14, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

My rememberer is not broken. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Poetry to my pointy ears

Posted on March 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Hey, you. F*ck a shrew. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Family Matters/Overheard

AGREED

Posted on March 12, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

That would suck if there were babies in there. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Family Matters/Overheard

Sound financial plan

Posted on March 7, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Lots of hot moms. Lots of money rolling through that town. So, if I get one of them pregnant, are we rich? Yes. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Pop Culture

Hugh Laurie is a god I will cut you

Posted on February 22, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

He probably just feels threatened by my intense love for Hugh Laurie. Well, we all do. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Science & Medicine

Deal sir

Posted on February 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

If I start uncontrollably spinning, just grab an appendage as it goes past you, okay? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Goodie

Posted on February 15, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Congratulations, you’re average! Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Random and Awesome

Seriously guys get it together

Posted on February 15, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

F*ck roses. Give us the techie stuff. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Poop Jokes

I do now

Posted on February 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You know I love farts, right? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Poop Jokes

Thanks kid

Posted on February 13, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I think I have to pee. I need to pottie. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

A high target for car theives

Posted on February 12, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I have to see if I locked my car. I have muffins in there. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Pop Culture

Not scared

Posted on February 12, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

So this Bruce Lee guy better not try to kick my ass, because I’ll fight back. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Cool Facts/Overheard

So say it again why not

Posted on February 11, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I have jugs in my car…which is an awesome thing to say. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Pets

Let me see that manual sir

Posted on February 11, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

He learned how to roll over!! Wow, how’d you teach him that? We just kept telling him and pushing him over. That’s how I learned too! Published with...

Drinking/Overheard

Sorry not sorry

Posted on February 7, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I was going to tell you, but you were on the phone, that I kind of drank most of the whiskey. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Science & Medicine

OooooOOOoooOOO

Posted on February 5, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You look like a hippie. I’m going to scare you with my knowledge. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Sci-Fi

Take it to the bank

Posted on February 4, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

This can only result in super powers. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Pets

Saucy

Posted on February 3, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Hey, stop doing the tassle-tail twirl. It looks like booby tassles. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Sports & Games

Why thank you sir

Posted on February 3, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You’re like the Aaron Rodgers of editing. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Tell me Sheila goddammit

Posted on January 29, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I don’t know how I feel about that hair. I know exactly how I feel about that hair. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Cool Facts/Overheard

Correct

Posted on January 29, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Wow. That’s a meat-waggle. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Pets

No judgments

Posted on January 28, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

For a split second there I forgot if I brought my dog in today. I have that same issue with my pants. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Technology and the Internet

Truly the source of all knowledge

Posted on January 28, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

No, this is correct. It’s on Wikipedia. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

I mean do you have to ask

Posted on January 27, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Do you have seven dollars and a hankering for the sweat-sniffles? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Random and Awesome

Not the best I guess

Posted on January 26, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

How would you feel if you were on a plate and then you were in the garbage?? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Sci-Fi

Hand it over Sheila

Posted on January 26, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

This is the button you push when you want to play Dungeons & Dragons with somebody. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/The Office

Life’s a bitch

Posted on January 26, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Now that they’re in town more, I don’t get my laying-on-the-couch time. I have to sit on it. And that’s not fair. Published with Blogger-droid...

Overheard/Sports & Games

Hey no judgment

Posted on January 23, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Aaaaand I just spent the whole morning reading about the Packers and looking for cute Aaron Rodgers pics for my profile. I’m pretty sure I’m 12 year...

Overheard/Technology and the Internet

Done and done

Posted on January 19, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I need robofingers, so I can type faster and not get tired. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Technology and the Internet

No

Posted on January 19, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I don’t understand why you’re so old school on the creepiness. Use some tech. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Thanks I think

Posted on January 17, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

You look like a New Years celebration. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Poop Jokes

Yes, please fart in the closet

Posted on January 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Wait — where is the fart closet? Our closet? With clothes? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Don’t tell me my business Sheila

Posted on January 16, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Do NOT get the sleep laughs. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Science & Medicine

Lemme see that doctors note

Posted on January 14, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

No one believes me that I’m wearing Moon Boots for medical reasons. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

Sandwich shenanigans

Posted on January 12, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

It’s not even a real sandwich. It’s like someone cut open this baguette and meddled with it. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Cool Facts/Overheard

Cool thanks for the warning

Posted on January 12, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

We either have some, or more. Um…I’ll be over here, thinking of other important things to say. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Family Matters/Overheard

Great advice pal

Posted on January 11, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Don’t ever have kids, for real. Adopt an 8-year-old. Just make sure they have all their teeth before you bring them home. Published with Blogger-droid v1....

Overheard/Sports & Games

Don’t make me kick you in the shins

Posted on January 10, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

If your player gets hurt, you get charged a time out. You know, so you can’t be like “ughhh, I’m hurt.” Like soccer players do. Publishe...

Cool Facts/Overheard

True fact

Posted on January 10, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

No, I’m excited. I’m never excited. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Drinking/Overheard

I’ll be there in five

Posted on January 10, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’m just gonna be drunk at home doing laundry. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Family Matters/Overheard

And we’d all thank you for it

Posted on January 10, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

If my mom was like that, I’d bring her to the bar. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

The power of torte compels you

Posted on January 10, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

All of that happened because of a blackberry torte. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Drinking/Overheard

Don’t judge me

Posted on January 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Are you trying to make yourself barf? Are you drinking Makers and wine? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Birds & Bees/Overheard

Keep going

Posted on January 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Oooh, that feels good. Is it weird that that feels good? Yes. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Sports & Games

Trademark that shit

Posted on January 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

First and Kuhn! Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Drinking/Overheard

Math is hard

Posted on January 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

This is going to be a rough whiskey drink with only like two ice cubes. There are five. Shut up. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Random and Awesome

I’m sorry

Posted on January 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

This reminds me of dorms. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

I pity the fool

Posted on January 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I like your chains, milady. It looks like pirate gold. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Happy Holidays/Overheard

Cheers all around

Posted on January 9, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Ah, yes. Great Successtivus. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Human Anatomy/Overheard

What a charmer

Posted on January 7, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

A kid just told me I have nice knuckles. Uh, thanks? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/The Great Outdoors

The list is endless

Posted on January 4, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

There’s so much material with gorillas — the extra long arms, the chest-beating, the banana-eating, the hanging out in mist… Published with Bl...

Music and the Arts/Overheard

Never too late to start

Posted on January 1, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’d I could do it all over again, I’d do it like Kenny Loggins. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Drinking/Overheard

I mean it wouldn’t hurt

Posted on January 1, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Oh my gosh, I can’t find my bag. Do you need more vodka? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Drinking/Overheard

Good planning

Posted on January 1, 2011 by Overheard in My Living Room

Do we need to f*ck with jackets? I’ve had enough vodka where I should be fine. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Insults & Injury/Overheard

Next stop sleeptown

Posted on December 31, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

He’s at sleeptown. He’s eating a nap sandwich right now. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Drinking/Overheard

Thanks for clarifying Linda

Posted on December 31, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

Not wasted. Somewhere between jolly buzzed and fantastical. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Sci-Fi

Is there really a range tho

Posted on December 31, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’m so bad at magic. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

But yes hand it over

Posted on December 31, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

Want some? It’s not that good, but it’s warm and salty. Ok, that came out wrong. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Drinking/Overheard

Somebody get this man a whiskey

Posted on December 31, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

You smell like whiskey. I feel like whiskey. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/The Great Outdoors

Inquisitive minds want to know

Posted on December 28, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

We wrote “help” in the middle of the field. We either used wood, or children. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Science & Medicine

Get em while they’re hot

Posted on December 27, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

Appendages are going like hotcakes. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Random and Awesome

Goddamn genius

Posted on December 27, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’m bowling in a leisure suit. I’ve never been happier. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Sports & Games

You don’t know

Posted on December 26, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

I mean, I don’t think they just play with cold balls. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Random and Awesome

Srsly is dad jokes a category

Posted on December 26, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

And, it comes with a stud finder. Well, all I have to do is look in the mirror. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Human Anatomy/Overheard

Carl put it away

Posted on December 26, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

Carl, show me your meat. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Words and Phrases

Neither Sheila pay attention

Posted on December 26, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

There’s a huge amount of wolf hair in our apartment. Welfare? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Sports & Games

What a steal

Posted on December 26, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

One dollar for nine holes. Let’s share. Yeah. That’s a lot of holes. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Science & Medicine

Lemme guess math isn’t your strong suit

Posted on December 26, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

Ok, two dollars. Four George Washingtons. Or eight George Washingtons, depending how you look at it. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Life & Death/Overheard

True

Posted on December 25, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

Careful sitting on that. It’s an heirloom. Well, so is he. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Birds & Bees/Overheard

No one asked you sir

Posted on December 25, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

Oh, I can’t get down on my knees anymore. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Human Anatomy/Overheard

Yes just like that

Posted on December 25, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

Look at the red lights on the dome — they look like breasts! Now there are three of them. Yes, it’s like an alien. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6...

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

Not sure what nevermind

Posted on December 25, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

Is there cream on the table? Yes, but if you’re feeling insecure you can bring some more. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Fashion & Failure/Overheard

Good story Sheila

Posted on December 25, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

My hair is NOT grey. It’s platinum-blonde and white. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Sci-Fi

You sound saucy

Posted on December 23, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

“Lower Decks.” That sounds saucy. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/Sci-Fi

Ensign Dreamboat Crusher, duh

Posted on December 23, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

Do you find Ensign Crusher a dreamboat? Yes? In an underage sort of way? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Birds & Bees/Overheard

I’ma need that code asap

Posted on December 18, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

What kind of A-B-up-down combo do I have to push to see some dick around here? Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Cooking & Eating/Overheard

Maybe second breakfast

Posted on December 18, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

That plus granola could pass as breakfast. More like elevensies. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Overheard/The Office

Maybe not tho

Posted on December 17, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

No voicemail. Maybe it was a robot, calling about enhancing my balls. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Literature and the Arts/Overheard

Seems legit

Posted on December 17, 2010 by Overheard in My Living Room

I’m just writing them down so I can look at them every day. Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5